........You've been puttin' up with my shit just way too long/I'm soo gifted at finding what I don't like the most, So I think it's time for us to have a toast
If you haven't noticed I've been quite obsessed with the song Runaway by Kanye West lately. If you haven't heard it yet, it is now available on iTunes and Kanye's entire new album will be released in November. I wrote about Kanye and his usual disastrous VMA performances in September but this year was pleased to find one of my personal favorite performances ever. Now I'm not here to speak about Mr. West but rather to talk about how these lyrics relate to my life and probably a lot of yours.
You ever feel like, even though you may be in love with the person, you just pick and pick and pick until you find numerous things wrong in them? I, unfortunately, live by this. I am getting better but I always want my bf's to be absolutely perfect. Why? Is it because I'm not perfect? Is it because I want some sense of normalcy in my life? Someones that's gonna pull me right back up when I begin to fall? Yes, these are things that I want but even when I am dating these "perfect" guys I start tending to find them too perfect and definitely way to attentive. So why do I envision myself with a perfect soul when actually all I want is someone who is as fucked up and crazy as myself. Someone who falls with me, someone who leaves me wondering, somebody gifted and genius but not in the traditional sense.
Considering I am moving to Los Angeles shortly here, I know I will find more of these types of guys out there then I would have any chance in Pittsburgh, PA where everyone wears a suit and tie, goes to their 9-5, goes to the gym, and has a weekly lineup of television shows until it's time for bed. Then repeat. Now this is what I find wrong, and what I don't like the most. I love spontaneous, rebellious, and a tad crazy human beings. But when I am in relationships such as these ones that I do love, I begin to grow tired from all the drama. It's all or nothing. Breaking up and making up. It's crazy crazy love. And we all know I LOVE dramatics to a point but when you find yourself either soo high you can't come down or so low you can't stop crying and screaming their name......well then you know you are in a troubled relationship.
Do you think finding someone just like yourself is always the best way to go? Or someone the total opposite being a better choice? My parents are COMPLETE opposites and yes they do love each other very much, they both never got to do what they really wanted to do in life because of the other and I just don't think that's far. I am an only child. Being an only child either leaves you with the typical only child perfectionist/OCD ways or you can interpret and build your personality when young off of the one that raises you. Not that both my parents did not, but my mother was the one who predominately raised me. She's the baby of her family. And that's the exact mold I fit. I also find myself dating the baby of the family often as well. Not such a bright idea but these are the ones that are basic carbon copies of yourselves. It's comfortable, easy, and all the time crazy fun.
So what do you guys go after the most and what works best for you? What do you always find something wrong in a person and are you finding out that you don't like the most?
Peace&Love
S
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