Sunday, May 16, 2010

Hot Like Mexico, Rejoice


*to those who are lucky enough to have never fallen into the facebook black hole and do not have a facebook account, this blog can be skipped over by you. For you are the lucky ones that don't have to look at half assed crap that they create and change to put in our faces everyday on facebook. Thank you.


Dear FB,

We've been friends since 2004 so when I said to my best friend today that I was really about to delete my account, she said "whoa whoa whoa, let's not get crazy here. you can't delete your facebook!" With that said, no I really feel like I do have a super strong connection to you that could not be fulfilled by any other mega queer social networking site, but if you keep pulling these crappy changes on me I just might have to(don't worry guys....I'd keep the fan page up for AWAYA of course.)

Now in 2004 facebook was so simple and delightful. You signed on to your page and you could only join groups that were from your university and to sign up you had to go through your college email to do so. It was very safe and cool. You know no randoms were going to get to you. As we moved forward facebook progressed but still went to your page when you signed on and now you could add friends from different schools and you could be in groups from all over the world. But slowly facebook went downhill. 1st bad move on their part......they invited high school kids to be able to join. Very stupid. And they developed a horrible opening page which they called the "News Feed." Basically what this so called news feed was was basically a stalkers paradise. All your crushes, bf, and ex bf's status's on one page. Totally not cool. This is when people started to fall into the "fb black hole". With all this news feed info bouncing around in your brain you found it completely necessary to click on everyones page and look at wall posts, groups, and photos until you could see straight anymore. When you called your friends they were obviously on facebook. If they weren't on facebook they were obviously talking about gossip that they saw on the news feed. Or, the worst of worst, they were crying because there crush had just changed his status to "In A Relationship". Yes these are all true stories and I KNOW you all know what I am talking about!
My other HUGEEEEE issue is the facebook suggesting friends and pages to you. That was bad but I took it. Now it suggests that you look at your friends old photo albums! Like why in the hell would I was to look at a random friends album from 3 years ago!!!!! I don't think so. Or the best is is that FB tries to make you write messages or write on the walls of the friends that you barely speak to. They like to call it "reconnecting", I like to call it garbage. The whole system going on over on the top right side on the home page is garbage! I don't care is I have 58 friends in common with a person. I still prob don't know them. I went to a school with 26,000 other kids! Moving on.

Now, like last week I think, they thought it would be cool to just make us "Like"(btw WTF is "like" all about" everything and anything we had written in our profile. Now that was just NOT COOL fb, NOT COOL. Then I don't know where in the hell the cool groups I used to belong to went. Ohh wait I found them. They are on my homepage, not even in my profile anymore for anyone to see. Then to make everything even worse is a total F'd up move they did a few months ago. Now we can't even use the privacy to say what we want going up on our wall or not. So everytime you "add a friend", "comment on a photo", "write on someones wall", or breath!!!!! it is recorded to your wall.

I think it's time this all stops. There are NO age limits, No college email limits, and the worst is that even Parents are now talking about and joining Facebook. Just not cool, not cool at all. Everyone should just do Twitter. I actually prefer it. You tweet quotes to yourself or write FML 20 times a day, tweet to celebs, and Post pictures of car doors or whatever. And NO ONE EVER BOTHERS YOU!!!! Because they can't because no one can write on your page! It's amazing. follow my sweet ass @sarahhollock and you'll see how joyous this is. If anyone reads this that is a part of the FB team I just want to let you know that you have created a MONSTER. Thanks!


S

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