I Think You Know

Funny. This was actually just a rant I went on while tweeting when I saw this beautifule #TrendingTopic: #messagetomyex And in the fucking gloriousmood I am in I just pretty much went off. Don't worry they are tweets. It will be quite short.
*Please note this is NOT my ex but it might as well have been

FuckU

#messagetomyex You are the cruelest human being I have ever met. You are only out for yourself and deserve the addiction yiu fight. You
11 minutes ago via web
Favorite Reply Delete

#messagetomyex KILLED me you motherfucker and I wish while sitting on the ground of a scummy college apt i would havenever looked your way!
10 minutes ago via web
Favorite Reply Delete

#messagetomyex You keep coming back and I keep letting you. Why? I love your lies and enjoy the pain. The good times were soo good. Secrets

#messagetomyex werealways kept & pacts were always made but you broke that pact. I'm falling....where are you? You fell and I ran. Fuck You.
9 minutes ago Favorite Reply Delete

I think you know your name by now. And I'm sure the readers are sick of you too. I really cared for you. No we didn't date but it was actually better than that. You were my confidant. Where are you? You told me you loved and cared for me. You leave and never call? Goodbye

P&L
S

I Was Enchanted To Meet You(pleasedontbeinlovewithsomeoneelse)

My little sweety pie, Taylor Swift, released her 3rd album recently and I just can't stop gushing about it! If you've been here from the beginning or just starting to read Andwhoareyouagain?, you'll notice I focus a TON on music. All music! I love it all but I a really soft spot for Taylor <3

I'm sure everyone can sing the chorus to Love Story and dance around like a dork like in You Belong With Me. Well I can too. Actually okay I'll just admit it......I'm like totally Taylor obsessed!!!!! I know every word to every song that she has ever sang. Sometimes I feel like she wrote these songs just for me, and I could care less what anyone thinks because T. Swizzle is the REAL DEAL. Not only is she one of the most amazing songwriters but she is also just the sweetest thing going. She's that girl that will stand outside for 18 hours, if it takes, to make sure everyone got to get a photo with her and her autograph. Shes just as madly in love with her fans as we are with her and that's a rarity now a days. I could go on for hours and hours about how much I love this girl and all but let's get right down to it. Let's "SPEAK NOW"!

Sometimes I hate Taylor because she puts these ideas in my head that I should do this and do that and this and that and ahhhh and before I know it I have totally lived one of her records! Shes that amazing. Ohh and btw 99.9 of her work is about boys and shes not afraid to name em'! Every girl.....literally, every girl, from age 5-105 needs this album in their life. I really don't know what else to say but......it's Taylor and she just freakin' ROCKS! Let's go through a few tracks...

MINE is her single that's out now. It's about actually not getting dumped, not running away, no bad guys, it's just a truly sweet song about someone being soo wonderful. A true love song. "You are the Best Thing that's Ever been Mine"



SPEAK NOW um f'ing fabulous and it's just what every girl has always wanted to do at one point. It's an amazing track based on "Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Peace". Did you ever notice no one ever speaks now???? I mean someone must want to. Well Taylor in her daydream does. She breaks that wedding up with no problem! Its such a fun song!!!! "don't say yes, run away now, I'll meet you when your out of the church at the backdoor, Don't WAIT or say a single VOW, U need to hear me out......and they said SPEAK NOWWW"



Dear John at 1st I kept skipping this but then then I started listening to it and it's the most beautiful song. To bad it's written for the asshole heartbreaker we all know as John Mayor! It's like hellloooo Tay....why you gotta waste such a beautiful song on such a loser? But in the end you'll actually begin to feel that you were just Tay, Jess, or even Jennifer Aniston. Sorry John. Love most your music but never ever would date ya. NOPE!





OMG I can't even do this review because seriously I love, can relate, can put ex's into, each and every song. That's the thing about T. Swizzle. It's like she's your new best friend. She reads your mind for whatever mood your in! Okay let's just do this I'll tell you my absolute favorite track and we'll call it a day. But PLEASE comment and let me know what your favorite track is!!!! Maybe we can even open a discussion about "Speak Now"! .........my favorite track from the Tayor's Speak Now Album is.............Last Kiss(with a side of Haunted) .....and I'm going to shut my mouth right there because ohhhhh do I have the perfect person and situation that went into that song. I almost wrote him a letter last week because of this songs power. BUT as Taylor would say "I dOn't thiNk YOu sHOuLd WaiT. I tHinK yoU ShouLD sPEaK NOW." I'll leave you now with the video of the 1st Taylor Swift song that grabbed me by the heart!OUR SONG!!!!









Peace&T.Swizzle

S

Cupid's Arrow Struck Me Silly

Did you ever find it really strange that we are all pretty much attracted to the same thing that we found cute in kindergarten? I know my kindergarten crush was possibly the cutest thing you could find but even at that age he had the bad boy/womanizer qualities about him. One week he was my bf and we we're holding hands and showing everyone what this love bug was really about. But.......as the kindergarten rule goes, that only lasted so long. Before I knew it he was holding hands in the playground with the huge tramp in our class! OHH how could he and what did I do. I was totally the cutest in our half day kindergarten and definitely dressed the best by far. Why me!

Well what I found out, not until after college unfortunately, that it wasn't me by any means, it was the icky blah I was always attracted to. Now I still consider myself to have the best in taste, even when it comes to the guy department, but one day 5 years ago my girlfriend Bekah sent me a card. It stated "Maybe this time we'll get over our bad boy phase" Ohh if it was just a phase, what a great thing thing that would be.......but to me it's a curse and instead of getting better it just gets worse. There have been the handful of nice guys that I had dated. The perfect guy, more intelligent than the world, always dressed to impress(well more like dressed to always be able to put on that perfect 1st impression which they are so good at), and so loving and adoring of you that you will feel suffocated even when they are not with you. These are what I call .....well probably the right ones to be with and get married to. If you want an itinerary of what is going to happen to you for the rest of your life.........and if you're looking for trips to Vegas and going to see tons of Burlesque shoes....well hey that's your fault. Now you get to go cook dinner, receive an ohh so NOT naughty piece of lingerie every now and then, a finally a graceful wardrobe filled with Ralph Lauren(and not the pieces you see on Gossip Girl).

Now it seems when it comes to love there is never going to be a win win in this situation. I personally cannot wait to start having children. Or so I always think until I hear one screaming at a restaurant I'm in and I would like to tell the baby off. I have no idea why i just mentioned kids because were going right back to my probs here. Kids would be way too much appreciated by the nice guys that I prefer to steer clear of. Now I am still kinda stuck in Kindergarten when it all comes down to it. I'm still used to be in hot steamy obsessive one of a kind love that usually last around 21 days. The kind that everyone gave up on a while ago. But I still believe. And here is why. I don't want ANYONE to change for me and with that I would NEVER want anybody expect me to change. We all are the way we are for a reason. And another reason why the divorce rate is up. You have to find someone you love from head to toe and never lets you have a moment doubt on why you took this chance. Because love is a chance. And don't you still want to be sooo in love when you are older that you are sitting and a room giggling about how lucky you are to have met this person and have them in your life? Ohh and that's just another thing......if you don't laugh literally 3/4th of the date, please just call it quits.

So I'm guessing my problem isn't that bad by any means. I'm a girl that knows exactly what she wants and although it may be the wrong thing to others, "losers" to snobs, or "Sarah-what in the hell are you doing?" then at least I'll know I'm truly happy. Whether it be forever or for a few months. Let everyone be themselves! Unfortunately that goes out to all you girls who are ALWAYS trying to transform yourself into something your not so you will find a new boyfriend. Ohh and please let them know of your past. Are you going to get married on a huge lie even if you are that much in love with the person. No. Love is truth and if they don't love you for your dreams, your past(who cares how deep you have to dig. That past has actually made you into who you are today, your laugh, and what you want your future to look like....his his.....but the both of you. Everyone is met to find true love and hey I guess I love bad bays haha. I know I'll be happy though just do to the fact that I don't judge people.

Peace&Love

S

*photos above all dedicated to Kate Moss and Pete Doherty(my fav hot mess of a couple ever)

You Are What I Never Knew I Always Wanted

Here are just a few random questions I had answered in May(2 months into my recovery.) I just found them and I think they are a pretty encouraging and strong for the state I was at. I hope some of them can help you and if you have any questions you know, I'm just message away!
1. Okay let’s just start off with I’ve been through a lot of shit and w/out it all…..good and bad………I wouldn’t be the person I am today.

2. Dancing is my therapy. I would be dead without dancing. It’s just something that my spirit has to do.

3. I don't plan or ever plan on planning out my life. I like to live spontaneously just day by day. I love having the courage to just pick up a suitcase and take off for a few weeks. I believe in living fully and just feeling free and liberated. I hate being under any restraints.

4. I’m 5’5’’ and 108 and am IN LOVE with my body and am soo happy to be able to say that! I think it’s soo beautiful. If I could walk around in underwear and a bra I totally would!

5. My absolute favorite thing in the entire world is to sing and dance. It’s the greatest high in the world for me.

6. I have a highly addictive personalty and have gone through times where this has actually gotten me into trouble and is also something I struggle with everyday. It get’s easier with time.

7. I like to drink my coffee at night.

8. I’ve met some of the most amazing people in my life. Some of them in bad situations, others in good. They all made a marking on my soul.

9. My favorite sports figure is Rafael Nadal. He’s the #1 tennis player in the world and is drop dead gorgeous on top of it. Vamos Rafa!!!

10. There are a lot of shallow people in the world and they can make up rumors and assumptions and they will haunt you. I just now got thicker skin and learned to cope with it. A lot of people talk and have NO IDEA what it's like to walk in my shoes. But I am a strong girl and I have a lot of strong friends by my side.

11. I love Kurt Cobain and what he brought to this world artistically. I am still enormously intrigued by him. He and Britney are the only people I can say I have been actually obsessive about. I just wanna learn everything!

12. My sorority sisters, and I know this sounds soo cliche, but I don't know where I'd be without them. It's like they breathe for me when I can no longer breathe.

13. I know the choreography for EVERY Britney Spears video and concert performances. Literally.

14. I adore animals and cannot stand animal cruelty. Breaks my heart in half. I am a proud member of PETA.

15. I'm a hopeless romantic and believe in love stories, fairytales, soulmates, and so on. Nothing makes me happier than being in love.

16. I figure skated for 7 years. And after that I took up dancing full time and was studying to become a ballerina.

17. I read and listen to music at all times. A few of my favorites are Eminem's Relapse, Taylor Swift, Radiohead, Nirvana, Lady GaGa,

18. I failed my driver’s license test 6 or 7 times. Hahahaha

19. I lived in NYC after college and the second place I lived I had to share a bed with Alia for 1,100 a month. You soo get nothing for your money there but it is totally worth it.

20. I think I was a European(in Barcelona, Spain haha) in my previous life. I really don’t believe in this fast paced American living thing that we have going on. If you look at other countries life is more laid back and enjoyed.

21. Michelle and Aaron are my sister and brother.

22. I miss Tera and wish she lived closer. We have a crazy kind of friendship that will never die. She’s the love of my life.

23. 4 inch stilettos are my favorite. I like to be 5’9’’.

24. I’m a pretty cool girl. And I love to make people laugh.

25. I go through life like a karate kid. -BS

Peace and Love

S

I'm Not Bulletproof

All this time I was wasting hoping you would come around/I've been giving out chances everytime and all you do is LET ME DOWN/And it's taking me this long BABY but I've figured you out/And you're thinking we'll be fine again but NOT this time around......

You don’t have to call anymore
I won’t pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don’t want to HURT anymore
And you can tell me that you’re sorry
But I WON'T believe you baby like I did before
You’re not sorry NO, NOOOO

Looking so INNOCENT I might believe you if I didn't know/COULD HAVE LOVED YOU ALL MY LIFE IF YOU HADN'T LEFT ME WAITING IN THE COLD//And you got your share of SECRETS and I'm tired of being last to know/And your asking me to LISTEN cause it's worked each time before

YOU had ME crawling for you honey and it never would've gone away, NO/You used to SHINE SO BRIGHT but I WATCHED ALL OF IT FADE

THIS IS THE LAST STRAW....NOTHING LEFT TO BEG FOR.....AND YOU CAN TELL ME THAT YOU'RE SORRY BUT I WON'T BELIEVE YOU BABY LIKE I DID BEFORE....YOU'RE NOT SORRY....NO, NO, NO


This song was perfect for you darling. It's sad that I have been wasting my time and love on you for so long. But, guess what, I can't do it anymore. You've broken my heart soo many times I can't even count and we're NEVER going to be fine again so I getting out. I loved you since the day we met and I don't know how that goes away. But I'm trying my hardest. Please don't call. I don't think I would have the strengh right now to not pick up. The worst part is that I would have done anything for you. I'm too fucking nice and have soo much empathy in my heart for you. I want to forget the past 5 years and move on and I'm going to do it. I have nothing bad to say about you because we are one in the same. I know you like the back of my hand and that makes me sick. I bring up your name and everyone moans "ohh not again" and I say "don't worry this time it's different". IT'S NEVER FUCKING DIFFERENT! I'm just a stupid girl wishing you would turn into my prince and whisk me away. I don't want you in my dreams, in my journal, and especially in my head! But I'm so in love. And we try to be friends but that never works and when we are alone everything is soo perfect but within a small amount of time we are not speaking. I just wasted too much time. Way too much time. Maybe we are too alike, maybe you don't love me the way I love you, maybe nothing. I don't know but I did figure your pattern and just like the song says "you're thinking we'll be fine again but not this time around" Please let me be. I guess if you haven't really changed in 5-6 years your not going to and I know you can't change people but damnit ***** you even let me read the fucking letter. You have half of my secrets that know one knows and I have yours. How do I repair? I'm broken. I'm a human being, way to kind to everyone, show way to much empathy, I'm just way to nice. And I am not changing that but I have to walk away and it's going to be hard. I'm erasing your number. When you are upset I come running and hold your hand and you tell me that you'll always do the same but you never do. And I'm not bulletproof so I just can't do this anymore. -And I keep going back to the one thing that I have to walk away from. I love you but goodbye.

I've been licking my wounds
Woke up in love and seems so great
We both can't subdue
Darling you hold me prisoner
My heart as been bruised
So sad but it's true

I'm sorry,
S

**I hope this makes sense and you know it's all true