Lets Give Them Something to Talk About

"Just another sign that you were European in your past life", as my Dad would say. This one got thrown at me when I asked if we could do dinner at 11pm last night. I really believe in past lives, and so does the person I am about to talk about. As I believe, I have many many Spanish qualities about me. And it's not just the food. (yumm!) But it's the freedom and artistic value there. Even if I was not directly from Spain, I do know I did come from a country very different then America.

My dearest, Johnny Weir, believes he was a Russian in his past life. I also thought that I was Russian, at one time, in my life. Not really that I was Russian in my past life, because at 10 I highly doubt I knew what a past life was, but I knew I wanted to be Russian! I wanted to figure skate for the Soviet Union! This is soo fun right now because my dad is watching me write this so I keep asking him about my childhood. hahaha. I did get a Russian translation book and a Russian dictionary from my father. I still have them. I don't know maybe me at 10 knows way more about where I had last lived then the me now? Who knows but anyways I was obsessed with Russian figure skating and the architecture/onion domes(луковичная глава, lúkovichnaya glava). This is most likely due to the fact that I, myself, was in a deep deep relationship/obsession with figure skating right here in western pennsylvania. Figure skating was my life so I thought I should take my act to Russia but my parents kept me in the states. Ok, Ok once again I am going on and on about me and this piece is about the difference and acceptance of homosexuality within the states and over in Europe. Here is an interview by Johnny that someone wrote into a blog. Please enjoy!



There are Part1 , Part 2 for the interview , and besides Johnny, the movie directors David and James and his best friend Paris were also there.

Johnny looked confident and shining. His hairstyle was kind of funny, similar to his hairstyle in 2007 off season.

But I have no doubt he has star quality looking, and has big impact. His face looked gorgeous and cute as usual.

His public speech was awesome. He has many experiences from media attention, press conference , etc.. so it may be no problem for him to talk in public.

But I respect that.

Johnny was asked about homophobia, difference between USA and other countries and he answered that you can find homophobia everywhere, however, in Russia, Europe and Asia, they appreciate art and beauty .

Whereas in the USA, many people worry about whether the art is masculine or feminine, rather than watching the performance of art.

Also, they worry about the image of the country. They worry about children, whether it’s good for kids or not.

Children will grow to be whatever they want, or whatever they were born to be. They will be attracted to whatever they want, and this happens naturally.

Johnny’s best friend Paris also talked about that figure skating is not about feminine or masculine and it’s not important.

In the USA judges, there are of course gays and lesbians, but they don’t like to see skaters openly showing their feminine side, because they have bad image of this and so they are scared for the image of USA.

Since I became a fan of Johnny, I found many discoveries in difference between USA and other countries.

I completely agree with everything what Johnny and Paris answered in the interview.

Ray was also saying the same thing when I moved here, but I could not get it at that time until becoming Johnny fan and knowing the fact by myself.

LOL, Ray is still telling me about it, about how stubborn I was for my view.

The point is not about masculine or feminine, the point is why do people care about whether someone looks masculine or feminine, gay or not.

And the problem I think is the view of many people who see gay and feminine as something bad. And I guess they are brainwashed since generations ago.

And the point of what Johnny was saying was that in the USA , most people don’t appreciate art and beauty for itself.

I also felt that many people here look down, and they don’t respect, art and beauty. In their minds, sports is always good.


I often read that Figure skating is “ Sport “, not “ Art” in the North American figure skating forums.

Those people who are strongly saying that figure skating is " Sport " sounded like as if it have to be " Sport " , because they have an issue with art.

It seems in their minds, art = weak, feminine, and girly. This is my impression. and I don't agree with that.

According to English news, there was a study conducted where they put a group of ballet dancers on the one hand and soccer and rugby players on the other, and put them under a series of rigorous exercises and fitness tests, and then compare the results.

According to the study, the ballet dancers came out on top, as far as being stronger, as well as more flexible and with more stamina.

Believe it or not, ballet is not easy, it's extremely difficult.

It looked to me many people are are worried about the image of figure skating is considered as girly.

It was not so familiar for me to hear those kind of opinions.

It's not girly or anything. Art is not easy.

Personally, I've never thought figure skating as "Sport" since when I first saw it on TV.

Until I saw Johnny, I was not so deeply into watching figure skating, and never checked the schedule of it, never cared for who won or not.

It was just beautiful to watch, no difference from watching classic ballet. I always watch it as Art. and Of course, I always thought it looks very difficult.

Other thing I really enjoyed in the interview was Johnny and his friend Paris's friendship.

They said that they were hating each other when they first met at a skating rink. Because both thought they are diva. LOL

We have A LOT to change here. If you truly take a look at what the true vision of an "American" should look like, it's absolutely horrific. I hope you learn a lot from just this small highlighted piece. There is a lot more to come on this subject.

S

Broken Heart and Broken Bones

I don't really want to talk about these things because I have been there myself and I don't really wish, since I'm in a very safe place right now, to bring them back into being topics of my life. Just on the celebrity end of this there have been a lot of overdoses and depression related deaths. Just in the past three weeks there have been three suicides of wonderful young men.

If you are wondering what causes this or why this happens to some people and not others and why it seems to really attack a certain line of work, well I will try to explain. Most creative people are VERY left minded. Also known as your emotional mind. Using your emotional side leads you to be fantastically creative. Notice the line of work I am speaking of....Artists(which if you still don't understand that includes everything and anything under the performing and creative arts). Yes sometimes we can go into the center and use our wise mind, but rarely do we use our right side, aka our rational mind. Being extremely emotionally minded leads you to being very spontaneous, ocd, obsessive, addictive, very high ups and downs, and a lot are complete genius's. We do things without thinking of the outcome, we often find things that we just love love love and cannot live without(loving your career as a fashion designer is a positive. Finding a substance is a negative.) See the connection here? But the problem is drugs in your system, for a person who if left minded, bring out soooo much creativity. A lot of great musicians(basically all of the best), wrote their best work while high. But where are they now? Mostly gone to overdoses and suicides.

I've only been okay for almost a year so I'm not saying I'm a hero or anything or I'm better than anyone who relapses because don't worry I have relapsed and I work everyday and get better everyday. I've been really blessed with wonderful psychiatrists who really put me on the correct medications. Some aren't so lucky. Including me. It took me 7 years to finally feel any release from the pain that haunted me everyday. Do I hate meds? Yes. Did they save my life? Yes. Will I continue to take them? I sure hope so. But I have to tell you sometimes when you feel well again it is soo easy to ditch your meds thinking you'll be okay. And before you know it your back at square one. This is what happened to me many of times and this is what also happened to Andrew Koenig who stoped taking his medications for his chronic battle with depression. He was found missing and found dead this week. Cause of death suicide. Below is a letter from his parents:

“My son took his own life,” he continued. “If you're one of those people who feel they can’t handle it any more, if you can learn anything from this: it’s that there are people out there who really care. You might not think so…but there are people who really, really care. And before you take that final decision, check it out again... talk to somebody.

"And for those families who have members who they fear are susceptible to this kind of behavior, don’t ignore it, don’t rationalize it. Extend a hand.”

His mother added, “I ask you all to familiarize yourselves with signs you may rationalize away. Don’t rationalize away anything. Connect with each other if there is something bothering you. There is love out there.”

Now I just read that another horrible tragedy occurred last evening in Los Angeles. Marie Osmonds son Michael took his life at the early age of 18. He jumped from his apartment complex building. He left a note. Not all is here of course due to privacy but here is a part:

"I couldn't deal with my life-long battle with depression anymore. I felt like I was completely alone."

And to finish, we had the death of one of my largest inspirations, Alexander McQueen who was found hung in his home just one week after his mothers passing.

That's all I can write. Sorry but all of this hits way to close to home.

Sarah

Also on the line of addiction, I had wrote this this week to try to make people understand how powerful it really is:

Once you are addicted to something it becomes your main relationship, the love of your life, the thing you can't live without. I am still in a highly addictive relationship with Klonopin and that is exactly how I think of the drug. You may be soo creative and brilliant at 1st. It makes you happy and alive so you want more, more, and more. But once your brain starts to center around the substance.....all your cares slip away. Before you know it you are deeply depressed and suicidal and the drugs have done this to you but you can't stop but you really really want to. Some can fight it. Some can't and surrender.

You Can Sit Beside Me When The World Comes Down

Let's talk about my possible future husband. So one fine day I was watching the lovely show MTV Cribs. It was just one and I was not paying attention at all until I heard this hilarious guy showing his apt. He was soooo funny and I was laughing so hard. I only caught the end of it when he showed his tiny bathroom and his bands van which has a love seat in it. I instantly adored this guy but I never found out his name.

The next week I believe the show came on again and in the background I heard his sarcastic jokes so I immediately turned my head and his name was on the screen. His name was Tyson Ritter. I grabbed my iphone and googled his name. So I found out that hes in a band called All American Rejects(don't make fun of me because I didn't know who he was. I listen to old school '90s punk rock not too much of the new bands). So I started to do a lot of investigating on this Tyson character. He has a video blog which is amazing and he makes no sense at all and that's what I love about him. His tweets on twitter are hilarious and his new look is soo rocker. I just love it. (sometimes he overdoes the eyeliner but I can deal.)

I'm going to LA soon and hopefully finding a job and moving there.....GOODBYE SNOW!He just moved there and he goes out a ton. I really hope I run into this Tyson Ritter. I really think we would hit it off. If anyone is a hardcore AAR fan PLEASE give me more into. He seems just like a super crazy nonsense down to earth chill dude. I like that. I'm kinda just like that too except he writes amazing songs. So in the end I really do think if this dude and I started hanging out we would be in Vegas eloping in no time at all. I'm pumped! hahaha

So long, Farewell....Auf Weidersehen, Goodbye

This letter is in honor of my favorite causes: Suicide Awareness and Prevention and To Write Love on Her Arms.

On March 6, 2010 it will be exactly one year since I was released from rehab and was given the chance at a better life. Today I chose to set my diseases free and live in peace with my new self.

Dear Depression,

You know you were with me for such a long time, I really never thought I would see the day where I wouldn't have to be aware of you and obey by your rules. For over the past five years I was constantly living in the dark because of you. I hid it well from everyone but you and I both know I barely bothered to try to live from one day to the next. I poisoned you with endless alcohol, bottomless pill addictions, and malnutrition. I couldn't see a way back nor did I care. I fed myself with coffee and cigarettes. Soo anxious at all times, I just couldn't bare to eat. I abused benzodiazepines and pain medication to help me get through the days, and alcohol binges in the evenings. You just kept getting worse. Finally, after numerous trips to the emergency room, I decided I needed to get help or this may be the end. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do and never ever ever want to do it again. And there I was holed up for 2 months. I saw no signs of recovery in the first 6 weeks then suddenly something changed. I felt myself again. I was alive. I went from 83 pounds to 108 pounds. I went from depending on a lot of pills to not even thinking of them. I was on medicine that actually worked for me. And I got to go home and was given a shot at life again.

I don't think what I tell you or how I describe my depression, and addictions can ever put you in my shoes. But I do hope it helps. This past year has been the most amazing year of my life. I wake up in the morning singing, so happy to endure another day. I went back to doing what I was meant to do, which is to dance. This summer I vacationed all around and got to see all of my dearest friends. I had real relationships again with actual nice guys. And all of this I did with a smile. A smile may not seem much to you but when you had forgotten what it felt like to smile, it means the world. I learned how to love myself. Not in the artificial way but really learned to love deep down from my soul. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do and the best thing I ever did at the same time. I'm genuinely happy and am soo thankful for these wonderful little angels God has placed in my life. I had to save myself though and that was the hardest part to understand. I'm so grateful to have my goals, dreams, and aspirations back. I'm me and I love it. Goodbye depression. I know I have a chance of seeing you again and I'm not scared but I am going to fight my hardest to keep you far far away from me.

Sincerely,
Sarah

P.S. HUGE celebration on the 6th!!!!!

But I've Made Up My Mind, I'm Keeping My Baby ohh

I'm not a television girl. Just don't really watch it too much at all. I'm always behind and usually don't know whats on and whats not. Now this doesn't bother me but it does bother some I often get "OMG what do you do then?" or "I can't believe you don't watch this! It's the best." I'm just more of a music and book girl. And personally I wouldn't change it for a thing. With it being winter now and I really don't feel like jet setting it around the east coast to other cold cities, I am home more often. With that, I began to watch some TV!!!! AHHH get excited! I'm totally up to like 4....ohh actually make that 5 television shows!!!

Okay so my 1st and foremost is Glee which I began watching in October, and the rest of these guys I pretty much just started; Jersey Shore(love that shit), The Office(ohh do I crack up), Take the Stage(love love love, makes me feel like I am right back in high school), Celebrity Rehab(ehh it's ok but if you've been to rehab this is really what it is like so it's not that entertaining if you've been through the real deal), and 16 and Preggers! And that is what we are gong to talk about today kids......16 and Preggers.

Well I got into this show by being snowed in for 8 days from a blizzard that we had a few weeks ago. There was a marathon on and after that I was like totally hooked. And by totally hooked I mean, I don't know what day or time its on but if I'm flipping through, I will totally watch. Like last night for example. The clock has struck midnight and I was no where near tired of course so I turned on my TV to discover a brand new 16 and Pregnant! Btw-I really miss the old cast. Anyways.....last night's episode was about a young girl named Nikkole(who the f spells Nicole like that. They completely butchered my middle name!) Nikkole was "going out" with Josh. And well I guess they did the dirty and this is what happened. Nikkole and Josh were having a baby!!! They both looked about 13....especially the Josh kid. Now Josh used to "talk to" this girl named Kayla, but we'll get into her in a few.

I usually do not feel sorry for these girls and I actually thought the couple that went ahead and had the child then gave it to a family who could not have their own children, was great. But sometimes I feel really bad. Nikkole is a great example. She showed no signs of maturity and was possibly the most quiet person I had ever come across. She did not seem like the type to even have sex that early so what I am thinking is that Josh, of course, suggested it and she just layed there and went along. It's really sad if you think about it. I truly couldn't tell if she and josh had a connection at all. Now they said they liked eachother but were both just sooo young I just don't think think they knew what was going on. Now after the baby was born, Josh was not allowed in Nikkoles house due to a conflict he had going with her mother. I just want to add for fun that the mom had like whitish blonde hair in scrunch curls with teased bangs from the '80s. Sorry I just had to tell ya'll that! Poor little Nikkole had no idea how to bond with her child it seemed and neither did Josh. They looked completly awkward with the little baby. So about 4-6 weeks after the baby was born, Kayla had entered Josh's life again. So what does Josh do? He goes over to Nikkole's house and informs her that he wants to "go with" Kayla again and peace out baby mama. Nikkole took this very very calm and collectively(because like I said before she does not know how to speak for herself and wouldn't disagree with a soul if her life depended on it.) Ohh Josh went to his new gf. BTW, who in their right mind would say "ohh josh your such a hot 15 year old and you have a baby I just totally want you and if your baby's mama comes near us I'll beat the shit out of her. You're mine! Yeah i don't know either but there it is another completely F'd up episode of 16 and Preggers.

Now I still don't exactly see the point of this show. They never give you a learning lesson at the end like "Hey teenagers having a child at this age is not the best of ideas if you can see. Please refrain from sexual intercourse." So what is the shoes point? Hoping kids will stop having sex in hopes of seeing that having a baby is a ton of work and very hard because you will most likely end up a single mother at this age? Or in hopes that they will see that they will lose the rest of their childhood? These little darling babies are so fortunate to have the wonderful moms that they do on this show but if this show is trying to prove a point, I don't think it's working that well.

For all of my teenage readers.....never let anyone pressure you into sex or anything that you don't feel comfortable doing. You have YEARS to have sex once you are in a serious relationship outside of highschool so please trust me when I say abstinence is a very good thing. I did not have sex when I was a teenager and am sooo proud of that. Always wear protection because I think STD's are up like 100% which is sickening! One out of 4 I believe is the number now for teenagers and young adults likeliness to have an STD. Not worth is kids. If you have any questions contact me like always and I'll give you my best advise but remaining a virgin and saving yourself until you are married is my best. Just know it only takes one time of having sexual intercourse to get pregnant and get an STD. If that doesn't scare you, I don't know what will.

Peace & Love

S

So Help Me Dress for my Fairy Tale, Can’t Wear Something I Bought on Sale!

I'm in this group on facebook and I don't know if I've been on it since this whole facebook thing started in '04 or if I joined it a couple years after that but it's called "Why Yes, I Do Frequently Burst Out in Song". I sweat this group basically because it fits me to a T. I mean some of the requirements to be in the group are:

Do you ever find people looking at you strangely, only to realize that you've been singing for the last fifteen minutes? Why yes....all the time.

Are you in love with musicals and Disney movies? Beyond obsessed thank you.

Do you re-write they lyrics to songs to make relate to your current situation? Ouch...yep ya caught me.

So as you see, I fit into this group very well. I think singing is just soo much better than talking and if life were more like a musical the sky would be just a little more blue! (I know you're all probably very sick of me saying that. sorry.) So here for you this evening, I present you with a very small portion of my favorite quotes from musicals. These lyrics just make me want to stand up on top of a car and belt it out to the world! I hope you all enjoy and feel free to add, as will I.

"But everything was beautiful at the ballet. Graceful men lift lovely girls in white. Yes, everything was beautiful at ballet. .....That's when I started class"-A CHORUS LINE

"That boy could use some Prozac."-RENT

"Rivers belong where they can ramble. Eagles belong where they can fly. I've got to be where my spirit can run free. Got to find my corner of the sky."-PIPPIN

"It's time to try defying gravity. I think I'll try defying gravity. And you can't pull me down."-WICKED

"I still....I still believe. You will return. I know you will. My heart against all odds.....holds still"-MISS SAIGON

"There's only us. There's only this. Forget, regret. Or life is your's to miss. No other road. No other way. No day but today...."-RENT

"Believe in the music that's inside your heart."-THE WIZ

"Give 'em the old razzle dazzle. Razzle Dazzle 'em. Give 'em the old hocus pocus. Bead and feather 'em. How can they see with sequins in their eyes?"-CHICAGO

"With a thousand sweet kisses, I'll cover you."-RENT

"Don't tell me not to fly, I've simply got to. If someone takes a spill, it's me and not you. Who told you your allowed to rain on my parade!"-FUNNY GIRL

"Into the woods you go again. You have to every now and then. Into the woods no telling when.....be ready for the journey."-INTO THE WOODS

"One singular sensation, every little step she takes."-A CHORUS LINE

"He had it coming. He had it coming. He only had himself to blame. If you'd have been there. If you'd have seen it. I betcha you would have done the same!"-CHICAGO

"Today for you-Tomorrow for me!"-RENT

"In sleep he sang to me. In dreams he came. That voice which calls to me. And speaks my name...."-THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA

Peace & Music

S

Ready For Those Flashing Lights

I'm doing some major cleaning at my parents house in my storage room. I'm not the girl too keep things and I regularly clean out my closet and possessions every three months and take them to the goodwill or if the piece was designer and gorgeous, I will sell on ebay. So last night I decided what a better night then tonight to start cleaning the storage room. I didn't get far at all because one of the 1st bags I picked up was filled with photographs. I tried to put it aside and not too look but it was just such an exciting find, I just had too.

Well let's just put this out there plain and simple. I have been a posing diva since I basically knew what a camera was. I didn't think I was that bad until I got to college(we'll get into that in a minute) but as I am going through old photos I noticed I was even rocking out my good side at three. Funny yes.....but normal, no! I am an only child as most of you know so it was always all about me. Not only did I know how to pose but I was actually a true little diva. Beginning ballet at 3 and figure skating at 6.....I was always the best in my field. Even while standing at the top of the podium, all my flowers were strategically placed in my arms and I am slightly turned to my right so I could do my best "head towards the left shoulder". This pose is also often used till this day. I also knew my best features from a very young age. The long legs were always extended and pointed and my butt was always made to look even more adorable in photos. I continued this professional posing and all eyes on me up until I left for college.....or so I thought. But the best was actually to come.

My best friend is pretty much a replica of me. We are both only children(she has step bro's and sis' but she was definitely raised as an only). Our mothers did everything for us. And we thought we were the cats' meow. This is one of the reasons I think we decided to be bff's. (And don't worry we still are. Soulmate Diva's). Our sophomore year of college we should have just been at modeling camp. For an entire 9 months, instead of trying to pursue school work, we worked on our best sides. Everynight we took photos. Everynight we would say to eachother "we look soo hot tonight it's just like not even funny." Were we serious? Yes. Do we still say that to eachother today. Yes. Nothing is wrong with self admiration. If everyone thought like this there wouldn't be so many issues with body image. We are not though, by any means conceded so I don't want you to get the wrong idea. Both of us are probably two of the nicest people you will ever meet. We just adored posing. We also frequently talk about the paparazzi like we run into them often. Let's just put it this way. We know how to rock the pose and dream of walking down the red carpet.

Now since I went to preforming arts middle and high school, I also thought knowing your best side and how to look best in a photo was normal knowledge. EVERYONE loved themselves and totally know their best sides and positions. So what I was wondering is......is this normal activity for everyone know since the world has turned into such a photographic place? Or does this start when you, maybe perhaps you're born with the gene, and stays with you the rest of your life?

Above is a photo of me at 3. I am posing in the mirror, checking myself out, while my dad took a photograph behind me. Seems cute huh? Ohh it is but if you look closely in my eyes you can totally see the demons of my soul, thinking and knowing "damn I look hot!" hahaha. BTW-please ignore my horrid turnout! Eww!

Peace & Paparazzi

S

-I would adore your feedback to know if this is a normal act or not. Thanks dolls!

Don't Stop.....BELIEVING!

Well it's time. I've held back as much as I possibly can but I am just Gleeking all over the place! If you haven't heard me go on and on yet or been annoyed by me singing mash up after mash up, or actually compared the characters to real life, or talked about my real life party time run in with my fav Chris Colfer.......well then where the hell have you been people. I'll admit it. I'm a tad bit OBSESSED with Glee. Now this addiction didn't start off with me actually wanting to watch the show. It started off with one of my friends making me watch the show and after that it was love at 1st scene.

SPOILER ALERT!!!(if you haven't watched or purchased the DVD's for Road to Sectionals, please do so and return back later.)

Just to make this a tiny bit easier, I will use character names only, minus guest appearances.

Synopsis is basic. It's about a Glee club and the bumps and turns on their road to the Sectional Competition. Two teachers are mainly focused on. The Glee coach-Will Scuster and the Cheerios coach-Sue Sylvester. FYI-Cheerios stands for Cheerleaders. Believe me you'll learn to love it. I make many references to peoples past who used to cheer as cheerios now. It's way cool if you think about it. Both are absolutely outstanding in their roles. I will also mention my favorite supporting grown up actress-Emma Pillsbury. She has extreme OCD and is secretly in love with Will.

Now to the Gleesters!!!! Let's begin with the phenomenal Rachel Berry. Girl can sing. Like she has given me goosebumps and tears before. She's anal, annoying, and WILL be a star one day. She wakes up to walking on sunshine every morning, does elliptical before school, all while staring at a photo of a Grammy award. You'll learn to love her.

Then there are Quinn Fabray and Finn Hudson. Quinn was head Cheerio until Sue found out she was preggers and kicked her ass off the squad. Finn is the HS quarterback but loves Glee club more than anything. He believed that he and Quinn got pregnant by making out in a hottub one night his sperm swam all the way into her vagina making Quinn basically a virgin mary. He's VERY dumb but so dumb its cute. And he is the lead singer in the Glee club along with Rachel......who is also in love with Finn. Which leads me to my next character, Kurt Hummel. Who is also in love with Finn. Finn's just that popular nice super cool high school dude that everyone loves. But his heart was with Quinn forever until he found out not only does sperm not swim in hot tub water and impregnate, he also found out that he's not even that baby's daddy! Puck is!!

Noah Puckerman aka Puck is Quinns super secret baby's daddy. Ok here's where I just want to add one thing. Dear Mark Sailling, I follow you on Twitter and you seem cool. I'm majorly attracted to you. I dig your mohawk and your sexy voice. I'm coming to LA in April and I tend to always get super lucky so I wouldn't be surprised if I was invited to visit the closed set. can't wait to meet you. xxx, S. OKAY.......and were back.

Let's move on to what makes this one of my favorite shows ever. If you know me or even if you don't, you can probably get the vibe that I dig singing and dancing as soon as I walk in the door. Musicals are the best things ever invented I believe and can truly brighten up anyones day. I promise! Now on an hour long episode of Glee, you are bound to run into 3-5 performances. From solo's to the whole glee club to the teachers. ITS FABULOUS! Yes, they may sing a few songs from Broadway hits(favorite being Rachel and Kurts duet to Defying Gravity from Wicked) but a lot of the music is more recent. More pop radio. It's actually brilliant what they've done. What they have done is what you call a "mash up." This is where you take two songs, mix them together, and there you have it people.....a mash up! Below are a list of my favorite Mash Ups and Songs preformed by the Glee Cast:

Halo/Walking on Sunshine
Don't Stop Believing
Imagine
Defying Gravity
Smile(Lily Allen cover)
Endless Love
Don't Rain on my Parade
My Life Would Suck Without You
It's my Life/Confessions Part II
You Keep Me Hangin' On
Talk A Bow
Keep Holding On
Thing Song/I Could Have Danced All Night
On My Own
**These are all available for purchase of iTunes or you can also listen to them on YouTube.

These are just to name a few. Basically if you love music you will LOVE this show. It's just one of those special things that only comes along every so often so I hope everyone is enjoying it. And basically, my friend Chris and I were speaking about this, this is THE dream job. Even though you go through many costume changes with all the Slushie Facials you receive hahaha. You'll learn the lingo.

Now everyone and their mother wants to guest star......why you ask. Because it's just that great! Last season we had a few guest start but the best being Kristen Chenoweth. She's amazing and soo sweet. You may know her by being the original Galinda from Wicked. Well to end the season we have several appearances I hear from the amazing Idina Menzel. Yoiu may know her from being the original Maureen(RENT) and the original Elphaba(Wicked). Now to who I wrote this blog......well besides to share my joy and make sure EVERYONE will be watching the Road to Reginals beginning in April, is to announce that someone who I just cannot stand for some reason. I don't think I'll ever know why. Has joined the Glee cast. Molly Shannon. I don't know what it is but I just can't stomach her. I don't find her funny and I just find her annoying. How is she supposed to fit in with this cast of genius'??? Can she even sing or dance!!! Hello, main requirement! UGH! My little T. Swizzle has admitted she is dying to get on the show too so lets hope that happens.

So I've only met one cast member so far and I had a complete blast with him and that Chris Colfer. Spent a night partying it up in NYC with him. Just adorable.....and such a diva! He even got to see my Slave 4 U.

I hope that was a good synopsis to catch you up for April or to convince you, if you have watched to go my Road to Sectionals. Be a gleek. I swear it's cool.

Peace, Love, & Music

S

BTW I make Glee CD's for my car, my house, and my mother. And yes....Glee and The Fame Monster are all I'm listening to currently. I suggest you do the same.

Imagine All the People, Living Life in Peace

Tomorrow may be the end for me. I have 2 cavities and am getting shot up with a lot of Novocaine and hopefully some anesthesia, laughing gas, or pain pills. I've never had a cavity before so of course this is going to be a very dramatic experience(it probably shouldn't be but if you know me it will be.) I called my mother today and asked her if you could drive on Novocaine. She proceeded to laugh and tell me to come back to reality. She often tells me that. I mean not that I live in my own little world or anything but I tend to see things in different lights than others. Yeah, that sounds right. If anyone could give me any warning on how this will go down, I will be highly appreciative.

Now onto the big news. "And Who Are You Again?" raised the fan base my almost 200 more fans this week. I couldn't be more thrilled. I am soo excited and I hope you guys enjoy the blog as much as I do. The best thing about "And Who Are You Again?" is that it is very non judgemental and had no absolute purpose. I write about everything under the sun and I like it that way. I have very deep postings that I cried while I wrote about the hard times I've been through, must have items of the month, music, theatre, dance, depression, anxiety, sex, and you name it I've probably written about it. I hold nothing in. Free as a bird. I appreciate you guys more than anything and am so grateful to have you all to read my thoughts. I always write back to anyone that writes me and I love it. So if you have any questions, just need to talk, or have a suggestion please feel free to contact me. My beliefs are to live life to its fullest, make as many mistakes as you can or you'll never learn, always go after what you want, it is better to have tried then to have sat on your ass and watched, go after your dreams NO MATTER WHAT. It takes a thousand no's to get a yes. NEVER give up! And most importantly be yourself. Everyone is so soo wonderful in their own way. Be different. Be who you are and hold nothing back. Everyone is BEAUTIFUL.

Peace & Love

S

Show Me Your Teeth

I feel like discussing fashion right now. You see I've been on a huge shopping spree(ok ok I lied it wasn't huge, I'm not rich, I just got my tax return and ya know it was time to spend since the Blizzard held me back last week). Let's just start with things I purchased. A strapless black crazy bird looking ripped up dress. It's fucking fabulous. I have been with Elizabeth and James from the beginning and I must say they are taking their pieces to a new level. When we 1st started getting E&J in winter '07 the line was basically an Olsen Twin. I was immediately in love. Gosh I can't remember my 1st piece from the line???? Humm I believe it was a white tee with a side pocket on the right. Ripped and used looking. Think Mary-Kate. But as I watch the line evolve I now see STAPLE pieces. FABULOUS staple pieces. Romantic blouses, tailored coats, and classic cocktail dresses with a twist. Over the past 4 years the line has, in fact, changed. Went from more of a rugged rock & roll look to a chic saavy rock & roll look. Anyways LOVE the line, always have and always will. Go on now and get your Elizabeth and James on!

And then I went on a search for a perfect pair of new jeans! I hate jeans actually and would rather wear a dress with ripped tights any day but you have to have jeans soooo....I tried a lot but finally settled on a great pair of J BRAND Denim Legging Low-Rise Skinny Leg jeans hahahaha. There is all the info on the fabulous piece of denim! Style # 901. Get them. You won't regret it. They make your ass look stunning and that's a promise(well you have to have a nice ass to begin with but you get the idea). I would have never thought to buy these great Denim Leggings if I hadn't purchased my 1st of Joe's Black Legging Pants, which I throw on literally everyday. So is you are behind on the new look(some bitch actually thanked me for being ahead on the trend. Duh!), I would suggest starting with the Joe's because they are a gift from God and then really just go and try on all the new delishious denim out there. These worked for me but maybe not for you.

And last I picked up a grungy looking tank dress by House of Gods. This line is dedicated to projecting rock and roll icons onto clothes. I love it! I love music, I dig the look of this line, and I just can't express how fond of it I am. So my dress has Iggy Pop on the front and his name on the back. It's done in a black, white, and grey. Although they are of course attached, the look of the dress is a black ripped up tank dress underneath and a smaller white distressed tank dress over top. Simply fab. I just tried it on with black fishnets and these amazing boots I purchased at PUMA. Just add some fun chain jewelry and a neon green Balenciaga and your good to go!

Be creative. Make your own style. Be yourself. And have fun with it. And if you have any questions I'm here for ya.

Peace & Love

S

P.S. I found the bag in the photo above on my favorite shopping site www.net-a-porter.com and its absolutely hilarious! Lets take it back to Season 2 I think of Sex and the City when Big gives Carry a bird clutch. Ohh sooo awful! But if you into that type of thing you an buy this baby for just $3,695. MUAH!

On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Dear Saint Valentine,

Thank you soo much for all of the lovely chocolates and flowers I received today. I would also like to thank you for all my Valentine Day admirers, both domestic and international. You boys are just soo sweet and I very much appreciate the phonecalls, texts, messages, hearts, and fake flowers you give me over facebook.

Valentines Day is a tough one. I have so many objections. Like the color pink and the over use of hearts. Everyone that knows me knows I HATE hearts and I especially hate pink. Go ahead through my wardrobe. You will not find a drop of these in any piece. I really love the colors white and black so I was going to just ask you for a simple change. Now I know lots of chicks dig all the cheesiness but I'm just not down. I'm thinking grey with the accent being black lace, and white hearts maybe. How about that? Even when I was a kid just trying to get by, I was always the one dressed in a normal Sarah outfit while the rest of the girls had pink or red tops on and pink hearts in their hair. It absolutely disgusted me. Boys dig that though. Something about tight pink tees really turns them on. I always had the cool guy valentines......the hipsters that didn't dig the girly fashion either. I think if we could just change the colors of February 14th, we could really take away a lot of the cheesiness on this date. Please let me know.

Today is also a great day to give a huge shoutout to all my ex's, some whom I've spent past valentines days with, and to say thank you. Maybe I cried when we broke up, maybe there were love letters involved(my favorite way to express feelings), maybe there were even tears on your behalf. All that matters though is that we lived and we learned. Thank you for being lovely little experiments. And umm yeah there are a couple of you that wish I would have never wasted my time on because you were worthless but let's just forget about those ones.

So I know your all wondering who was my Valentine today? Keep guessing all you want but I've learned to keep my personal life, personal (bad romance blog anyone?!). I hope you all had a great V-Day and don't worry hopefully the pink and the hearts will diminish very soon!

Peace & Love

S

Hit Me Gaga One More Time

Cause this will be epic is this follows through!

Gaga's dad, who allegedly met Britney at the Grammys last week, chatted with Britney and told her how much Gaga loves her and would die to record a duet together.

"GaGa has made no secret of just how much of a Britney fan she is,” a source told Britain's 'The Sun.'

"She has even admitted she used to have posters of her on her wall and she was a great source of inspiration when she was a struggling songwriter."

"She was delighted when she found her dad chatting away to Britney at the party."

"He introduced them and the three of them were locked in conversation for ages."

"At the end of the chat, they exchanged numbers and agreed to go into the studio and work on music together as soon as GaGa finishes her Fame Monster tour."


Okay now before we all jump up and down for joy, cause I know I just did, just remember this isn't OFFICIAL. I did hear this rumor though through Perez after Grammy night about how they hung with Britters all night and had a blast so this could definitely be true. If this does happen though it will be EPIC! I mean let's take say toxic and combine it with just dance......what do you get. Fabulousness! Thank goodness Britney will finally be given a direct fashion makeover from the Haus of Gaga. This has been much needed seeing that she dumped all of her stylists and decided that she knew how to dress on her own and we see this is just a horrible mishap of Brit's part. But they both like to be barely dressed so I have a feeling this will definitely work. Thoughts? Actually if you have bad thoughts.....keep them to yourself. I know my girls will kill this!

Peace & Love

S

Measure Your Life In Love

Just a quick reminder to all......please don't forget to participate in this weekends cause that is very near and dear to my heart. The great cause is called TWLOHA-"to write love on her arms", is a non-profit movement dedicated to presenting hope and finding help for people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury and suicide. TWLOHA exists to encourage, inform, inspire and also to invest directly into treatment and recovery.

To Write Love On Her Arms Day is a day where anyone can write the words love on their arms, to support those who are fighting against depression and those who are trying to recovering. On this day, just write love on your arms, and show it off, other people will ask why you have love written on your arms, and you tell them you are supporting to write love on her arms day, and how its benefiting a non profit organization helping stop depression, and make love the movement.

Thank you guys sooo much and please upload your photos up to "And Who Are You Again" and we'll make a special section!

Below is the link and please rsvp attending. It would mean the world to me.
http://www.facebook.com/#!/event.php?eid=210328952677

Peace & Love to all......xoxoxoxo

S

Nyquil After Crack, Puts You Right On Your Back

I have not a clue where I found that quote from above from, but I was just digging through notebooks in my room and found it and find it quite hilarious. I googled it and the post said "Yeah you can do NyQuil and crack together if you wanna die!" hahaha. Due to the snow I haven't been out in 3 days and am losing my mind, along with the rest of us snowed in people. This snow really just f'd up everything now didn't it. Well actually just for me. My income tax money was deposited into my account on Friday and all I wanted to do was run to Nordstrom and get this fabulous Versace bag I had been eyeing up for a while. Did I get there.....NO! But you know what.....it might have been a sign from God just looking out for me and reminding me I have no business getting a $1500 bag right now when I have plane tickets, bridesmaid dresses, shower gifts, new headshots, dance classes, and my great student loan that is backed up about 5 months to pay for. All in all I guess this is good. Not to say I'm not going online shopping after I write this.

I take it the Superbowl is on right now. I watched it last year so I have enough Superbowl in me to last me a while. I threw a huge fit last year but finally my friends made me watch it and I even let them put a steeler decal on my cheek. I looked pretty sweet. Just like a true Steelers fan. Tonight I am rooting for Reggie Bush because I think Kimberly's tweets got stuck in my head and if I don't root for him she's going to come get us! I mean it people.....root for Reggie(whatever team he may be on.)

Back to the beginning of this lovely piece I have going on here, I would like to share with you more quotes and song lyrics I have written over the past 5 years. Just to give you a heads up; There is nothing about love and most are about....well I don't even know! Here you go for your entertainment:

1.
Prenuptial Bliss
Wholesome Green Tea
Klonopin Prescription
God Bless Me
Feel Skin
(Come) Within
Harder Now
Just Let Me Go

-Well from what I see in the great poetic structure is that I like Klonopin and I didn't feel like having sex that night. I don't know. I guess theres a lot more to it. It's probably about dying. Okay lets move on....

2.
Down Below Your Spinal Tap
Scream Between the Scenes
The Hour Glass is Almost Up
Please Don't Try to Find Me

-Humm.....I don't know. But I really like this one. I can relate it to me trying to run away from everything that was going on in my life and wanting to start new. Prob written in 2006.

3.
Just take My Hand
Whisper Softly in My Ear
Your Voice is So Distraught
I Don't Think I Want to Hear

-I get my heart broken a lot. But I also break a lot of others so until I learn(which I am getting better), I expect this karma.


Okay enough with the shitty poetry that I happen to love. We'll do my delicious song writing another day. One doesn't even have a bridge. It's a hot mess.

If you have a twitter please follow FairNewsSpears. What's going on with Britney right now is just absolutely insane and seriously I have no respect for any member of her family at all anymore. I know I said I am writing a full piece about this and I promise I will as the story keeps developing but until then......Do you think it's fair, if this is the true case, that a young woman who has bi-polar disorder should be under conservatorship for the rest of her life just because she has a disease that can be treatable? She needs her trashy alci redneck of a dad far far away from her. Who can't see this? Only she can fix herself and being in restraints would make me wanna act out too. Especially when the court has no date of release and is considering her still sooooo fucking insane that she can't use a phone, watch tv, or even sleep in peace(the court has now even hired a guard to stand outside of her bedroom at night to make sure she doesn't make any phone calls or try to get away.)

For all of you who are not stuck in the blizzard right now and are not under a national emergency, please have a great time this evening and take a jager bomb for me.

Peace & Love

S

-Ohh and great news! While I was drunk and mad about the snow friday night I finally decided to learn how to work my mini Kodak camcorder. I have great footage. A whole 12 minutes of me hiccuping and talking on the phone while the camera faced the ceiling. Good stuff I tell you!

We Set the Fire to the 3rd Bar

Whoo hoo I am just soo excited to give you February's Must Haves!!!! I wasn't able to do a January due to my busy schedule so this one might go beyond 10 but that's just because I have soo many wonderful things you all need to put in your life! I hope you enjoy my loves.....

12. Urban Decay's Alice in Wonderland Book of Shadows. This is an adorable book of shadows created just for the upcoming release of Tim Burton's "Alice in Wonderland" starring none other than my favorite hottie, Johnny Depp. This is a perfect thing if you're late for a very important date!

11. High Top Sneakers with Ripped Up Fishnets. I've been seeing this look a ton on photoshoots and spreads and I am LOVING IT! Now you can throw a higher sock on with this as well. I'm ehh ehh on that. If you do keep it hot by doing a Miu Miu sock.

10. Good Health. I am so thankful that all of my family and friends are in good health, including myself. Whether it be through prayer, love, or wishes please always keep this as an everyday reminder of how grateful you should be.

9. O.P.I. Moon Over Mumbai polish. I've been keeping this polish my dirty little secret for the past couple months but I want to share the love. This Greyish White polish is fabulous and a must have for your collection.

8. A Twitter Account. I have NO IDEA how this happened but I am just obsessed with Twitter! It may be because I can freely stalk my soulmate Tyson Ritter, or ask fashion questions to Guilinana and she'll answer. It takes a couple months to get into but I promise you'll like it. Follow me if you already have on @sarahhollock

7. Glee: Road to Sectionals. Okay I don't know what else I can say about this show but it's just absolutely amazing. The talent of the cast is out of this world and I promise you before you know it you'll be making "mash ups" of your own. A MUST HAVE for any music/musical/awesome, person! Just do it. I promise you won't regret!

6. Passion. This is such a key in life and without it you don't get too far. You have to find what you love and live it. A dream that you had from since you can ever remember. Go after what you want. You don't live this life ever again. So instead of sitting there in a job you hate, take a chance and jump. Even though you may fall.....you tried and you can just get up and do it all again!

5. Sunglasses. You can never have too many pairs and gosh are these great when running around and looking grungy with a great pair of shades on. So I was just in NYC and I totally stocked up on Canal Street. I own four pairs of "real" sunglasses that I have paid a lot of money for so when I was looking I really knew what to look for. Dude these fakes are sooo just as good as the real. And if you lose them you won't freak out because you just lost $350.

4. Shop Intuition line at Target. Now I have been a fan of this boutique in LA since I was in college. I remember ordering everything I could get my hands of from here for Christmas's. Now you can get some adorable pieces at your local Target. Don't you just LOVE Target?! Right now there are 2 amazing scarves, an awesome rocker chic chain necklace, and tie died headbands like the one I have on in my fabebook profile pic. Go get it all now cause it quickly disappears!

3. O.P.I. Mad as a Hatter polish. The cheapest way to switch up your style in this time of economy stress is to switch up your nail lacquer. This is part of a four shade collection they did for Alice in Wonderland. Go get to your nearest salon now and treat yourself!

2. Elphaba Wicked Wand or a Galinda Popular Wand. Whichever character you choose to prefer you can now own the powerful wands these two amazing witches own. I personally love the Wicked Wand and I also believe to get through this life, it's much more fun to have a magic wand to wish your way around! Now you can fly high and defy gravity!!!

1. And most importantly....Best Friends!!!

Peace & Love

S

Streets Are Uneven When You Are Down

I got on here to write and truthfully I truly don't have a damn thing going on that's super fab right now to talk about. I am still working on the Rolling Stone piece which is awesome but not post ready by any means and well this poor Britney conservatorship needs some tweaking so I am holding out on that until tomorrow. All I'm really worried about is Valentines day. I still have no valentine. I don't like this and it's very unlike me. I am usually always seeing someone. I mean what's going on here? Did I get ugly? Boring? Non-Enticing? I just can't see any of this being true so where the hell are all my bf's!

And did you know it's been 2 1/2 months since I have dated anyone? Yeah. True. Horrible, I know. And you also know what that means....It's been almost 3 months since I've had sex. Maybe that's why I'm in a bitchy mood? I don't like going 3 months by any means! Saturday evening my friends and I went out and Mike and I tried to find a hot short term bf(I'm not looking for anything serious. If you missed that just head back a few blogs and read why.) We found NOTHING! No one of my type. Do you know who just popped into my head of someone I'd like to hook up with right now? Some of you may get offended by this but I just can't help it......Justin Bobby. Yep. Justin Bobby. I'm just feelin' him right now. Gosh that's sad.

I think I'm going to tweet my soulmate and let him know I'll be his valentine this year even though we are separated by a shitload of states but Ty's worth it. He better not have a Valentine yet!

Another thing bugging me out are my creepy dreams I've been having. They're like drug dreams. Ex: My friend Joe and I are in a forest sitting on the end of a huge fountain. We're getting ready to go see "In the Heights" but to twist it up we are the musical basically. I'm am a witch. To be specific I was Galinda from "Wicked" and Joe was Peter Pan. All I remember is that I suddenly got up and began to sing to him, very dramatically of course, grabbed his hand then threw it down and ran into the forest. Now this is the cool part. Joe aka "Peter Pan" turns in the Phantom and sings "Come to me Angel of Music" over and over. We find eachother and sing the great epic love song while we run and skip all around.

This is what happens when you watch too much Glee. Don't do it kids! (hahaha j/k I'm about to go watch a couple episodes again right now. I basically have all dialogue and mash ups memorized. I'm that freaking cool!)

P.S. Courtney Love totally is crushing on Lady Gaga and they both have a thing for Britney so how epic would it be if we could get the 3 of them to perform together. It would be very kick ass!!!

Peace and Love

S

When Your Mind Breaks the Spirit of Your Soul

The Grammy's were on last evening......obviously. I think everyone did a great job!!! Ohh to be nominated for a Grammy??? And then win! Can you even imagine the feeling! It truly must feel very dreamlike. And I'm soo happy Taylor and Lady Gaga accomplished this dream last night. Simply amazing!

The show began with the woman of the year....Miss Gaga. She was there in all of her glory with amazing costumes, and a glorious duet with Elton John. She stated today that that was her favorite performance of all time that she's ever done. Like I've always said about Lady Gaga is that she is a true blue fan to her fans(little monsters). Today she tweeted over and over and over about how much she adored all of us and how she would be nothing without. I think all artists should take note of this. I know every musician values it's fans but Gaga takes it a step further which in my eyes want to be a fan even more. Congratulations pretty girl and btw your red carpet was the most fabulous piece I think that I have ever seen you in. You looked gorgeous and like a fairytale princess. Loved the star! And that's what you are! Andddd moving on....I really did adore everyones performances last night and that is usually very rare. I even loved Beyonce. Well she did sing my favorite song of hers "If I Were a Boy". Now here's when I get made sometimes about Beyonces performances......do you ever feel like every year it's complete deja vu with her. Same choreography, same diva hair swing over and over, but this year she took it one step too far. You do NOT take a song that someone has already well known covered and do it at the Grammy's. You looked very silly doing that. Everyone knows Britney performed a mean version of "You Outta Know" on her tour this summer. There are other boy hating songs that you could have chosen. But that's why I love Britney. No matter what the hell is going on, everyone still copies her every move. Ohh and seriously when Brit was trying to get in the theatre last night and people were screaming and running after her. Totally inappropriate! Leave the girl alone! That's all I can say on Brit at the moment because I have a whole theory I am sharing with you this week on the poor girls situation. So.....moving on! Pink you kick ass but you already did a very similar performance at the VMA's so I wasn't as into it but I adore you and wow the talent! You got it all. Nothing to say about the Black Eyed Peas but I adore you all and think you are all genious'. Can't wait to see you in concert once again! P.S. Fergie, I just think you are such and amazing and strong individual. I look up to you.

Ok so now onto my favorite part of the show. This was when I found out they are making a musical out of "American Idiot"!!!! We all know I'm highly obsessed with musicals and like I always say....."if life were a musical, the sky would be just that much brighter". Soo excited about this and HUGE CONGRATULATIONS to Green Day for this unbelievable achievement! Are guys are adorable and I've loved your music since the good old Dookie days. I actually had your CD on my Must have of November I think haha. It is a must have so if you don't have it get it now!

To sum up the evening I would just like to say congrats to my little favorite person this year. Someone who I listen to every morning. Someone who can always put a smile on my face. Someone who writes cheesy love songs about fairytales and soulmates and everything I believe in.......Miss T. Swizzle! Muah doll!

To all the nominees, winners, performers, and presenters; Thank you for putting on a wonderful show. Hopefully last night music came into many lives and will be changed forever. I know I would be nothing without music so everyone support your local bands, and be an activist for music programs in schools. It's very important to have that growing up.

Peace & Love

S

MONSTER CLAWS TO ALLL